Tag: narnia

  • Narnia Man Insists Entire World History Rewritten Overnight

    Narnia Man Insists Entire World History Rewritten Overnight

    Narnia man, Gator Tavish, believes he witnessed the complete destruction and reincarnation of the world. Local law enforcement was called to the market where the Narnia man was accosting patrons, professing knowledge of “The Truth.” Paramedics were called on to the scene as it was believed Tavish was under the influence of narcotics.

    Tavish ranted for many sessions about a series of fey planes tormented by a malevolent witch named “Jessica.” Tavish alleged she was abducting children for unclear but diabolical purposes. Authorities say Tavish became uncooperative during questioning and insists that there is a group of adventurers working for “a dragon-like Avatar of the Celestial Librarian” and believes that they caused the world to end and then begin again. The Gazetteer reached out to Gator Tavish after he was released into the care of his sister. We were unable to get a response.

    We asked local priest Father Bippy Cartouche if it is possible the world could drastically change in ways which Tavish claims possible. His response: “I think we would know if the world ended because we’d have been there to see it.”

    Since then, Tavish released a short statement calling for understanding and says he now believes not only that “The Greatest Retcon in Fable’s History” but also it is all just part of Aslan’s plan. The Gazetteer reached out but Aslan was unavailable for comment.